Old posts posted

Just posted 2 old posts. 😃

This morning I was all emotional. I just wish I was the one with the fertility problem. I can tell you that I would be more proactive than dh. I would of stopped tobacco use immediately, like after the dx in 2006. I would have done everything in my power to get where I needed to be for myself and my spouse. Before we got married we had agreed to have kids right away. I was 29 when we got married and I wanted to have a child before I was 30. Well here I am 31, going to be 32 next year and nothing. I wanted to see RE in Jan or Feb to get the ball rolling. Several weeks ago while reading the RE clinics ivf folder, I found out that we need to be on antibiotics 6 months prior to the procedure. So that is why I wanted to go in early this year and start maybe in July so we can have an August transfer. I expressed this new find to dh and we got into an argument. Maybe be we spoke about in bed but he was upset...he was saying, I thought we already talked about this. Well, what did we talk about? He of course annoyed answers back again you should know. Well, in my mind I had different scenario than what we had talked about in the past. All I can remember we spoke about was that I was making an appt to see the RE in the summer. And that I would give him time to quit. But since my new findings my mentality changed. He said he wanted to get himself straight. This coming year we will get you pregnant one way or another.

28 weeks...Goal 10 more weeks

We have made it this fare my little sweet babies...can we make it 10 more weeks? This Wednesday is my glucose test/ob visit. I hope all continues well...can't wait for next detailed ultrasound. Hopefully we can get 3D again to see those little cute faces.

Your Body:Woohoo! You have hit the third trimester mark, so add another notch to your belt (both figuratively and literally).


Your Baby:As the Big Day nears, your baby is getting ready to go towards the light at the end of the tunnel (the tunnel being the birth canal, the light being the one the doctor is shining directly into it so she can see what the heck she's doing). Other highlights this week:Your baby's eyes are partially open now and can blink. Truly superior babies can actually wink. (OK, there is no way to prove that, but it's fun to imagine, no?) Your baby can also now become a shiny, happy person as she has begun having rapid eye movement (Get it? REM? Shiny, happy person?? We'll be here all week.)Her eyes have color now, too. It may not be the color she ultimately ends up with, especially if they're light gray or blue. The eyes typically don't settle on a final hue until nine months after baby is born. So when your mother-in-law says that the baby has her eyes, you can politely inform her that they'll most likely change soon. Sorry.Your babe is downright chubby compared to a few weeks ago. She is about 15 inches long, about the length of an amusement park cinnamon-sugar-coated churro (yum!), and weighs 2 to 3 pounds.

I am good!!

At my annual appointment and this time not bothered. I believe in miracles and it can happen if it is Gods will. I feel at peace and am good with my two babies. They are healthy, beautiful and growing up with Christ in their lives. I am married to my soulmate and have a wonderful marriage. Now that I am less stressed at work I am working on me to get myself healthier and back I’m shape.

CHEERS!! 🥂👨‍👩‍👧‍👦💏

On a side note: When I was leaving my appointment and crossing the road to get to my car, this older gentleman waved at me and he was going to pass by me in his car and said are you pregnant? And I said oh no I am just getting out of my appointment. He said I was going to congragulate you if you were. He asked if I had kids and I said 2 and would love to have more but it’s not happening…

When I talked to my mama she said that was maybe an Angel. She had had dreams that I am going to have another baby. I guess we shall see, if it is in Gods plan - it Will HAPPEN. In my car when I got in- the song “Thy will be done” was playing.

Still bothers me

After all this time, every time I come to gyno appointment I am reminded of my infertility. Nurse asked any birth control and listed all and I said no not on anything can't get pregnant. Needed help to get pregnant for my kids. I am absolutely grateful for them. They are smart beautiful and wonderful kids. Love my OB, just hate the waiting room and annoying nurse questions.

Long time no post

Hello, not sure if anyone reads or follows this blog anymore, it's more for me than anything. But you are welcome to read. Update: my sweet babies are big kids, 5 years old and thriving. I love them so much and thank the Lord for them. Just praying for you 1 more healthy baby. Kiddies r praying too!! Today at OB and just got my 1st prescription of Chlomid. Was gonna wait but be of my low ovarian response going to start taking now (cycle day 5). Praying for a miracle. Will keep my posts updated!! Also, doing acupuncture too!!

Here I go again

It was up in the air if we would try again, why would I want to put myself through something else? Well after much thought and deliberation we decided to give it 1 more 'ol try. This time it will be IUI. Why do it again, last try didn't work. Something is tugging on my heart strings for another baby. This weekend dh mentioned that one of his college buddies wife is due with her 4th. YeA the same couple that got married a week before us in 2005 and were announcing their 1st pregnancy months later. I remember then how my heart sank when I learned the news. It kinda sank a little this time too although not as painful bc I have to beautiful souls with me. So, here I am at the drs office waiting to be seen to see what our action plan will be in the next few months. I am going to remain cautiously optimistic, if it is in Gods plan then it will work!! If not then I will be sad but thankful that I have my Charlie $ Chloe in my life. I am so thankful for them to have made me a momma. I love them with all my heart & Soul forever!!!!

Time heals but you don't forget

It's been awhile since I posted. I am doing pretty good. As time passes I'm healing but I won't forget. It almost feels like it was another lifetime, like it didn't happen. I am so imersed in my life..work, job, kids/hubby that I haven't put much thought in my events. Occasionally I'll have flash backs, but they don't hurt as much to think about. I love you my little angel baby in heaven!!

Waiting for my 2nd opinion

Not looking forward to this visit but I need to do this for my peace of mind. This just sucks!!!! I wish this was not happening to me. I wish I was pregnant with a healthy baby. I've been making it...somehow. I feel like if don't think about it this is not really happening to me. 2012 & 2007 are 2 years that I will remember sadly.

Update:
Confirmed, baby is no longer with us. It's hard but I'll be ok & will get through this!

Waiting to see my beautiful baby

At RE 10min past my appointment....will be worth the wait!!
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Update:
Olive is my angel baby.